“Where have you been?” her mother demanded. I hadn’t noticed before, but she spoke with a slight accent, something that sounded a bit Slavic, maybe Russian, but pretty faint, and she had no trouble with W’s.
The damage was done, so I followed Maddy out the door, trying to look somber and not at all like a pedophile. I’ve had practice at that. The trick to that is to look like you’re a little uncomfortable around children and confused why they’re near you. A perplexed look helps. I sometimes, to inspire such a look, I start trying to make sense of the Clone Saga in Spider-Man. “She came knocking on my door,” I explained.
Her mother gave me only a cursory glance up and down, and then redirected her attention at Madeline. “You know better than to knock on strange men’s doors… and to leave without telling me where you’re going or taking your phone? I almost called the police!”
“I’m sorry, Mom…”
“I want you to go to your room, right now. You’re grounded.”
“No buts. Now.” She unlocked the door and ushered her inside. Maddy went without a word.
Her mother stayed behind and looked at me with a gaze that, to me, seemed like it was running a pedo-scan. Luckily, it must have been defective, because she said, “I’m sorry she bothered you, Mr… uhm…”
“Brown,” I said. “Don’t be too hard on her, she just seemed like she really needed somebody to talk to…”
“Yes, well…” she paused. “She told you what happened?”
“Eventually,” I said. “First she just cried a lot. I’m sorry about you and your husband.”
She shook her head derisively. “I’m better off without him, the bastard.”
“I know it’s none of my business, but… she seemed to think she’s never going to see her father again.” I wanted her to say that was ridiculous, that they wouldn’t let whatever was between them hurt Maddy.
She looked back to the door, and then to me, and said, “Well, that’s up to him. But if I were her, I wouldn’t hold my breath.”
“I just don’t understand that,” I said. “If I had a daughter…”
“She’s not his daughter, not really.”
“Oh,” I said, a little stunned at this new information. I assumed then that he was a stepfather, but Maddy never said or even hinted. “I didn’t realize he wasn’t her biological father.”
She laughed bitterly. “That’s the problem, neither did he.” she said. It must have been obvious how shocked I was by that explanation, because she rushed to justify herself. “Don’t look at me like that, you don’t know me, so you can’t judge. I’m not proud of it, you understand, but we were only married a few months, and he was stationed out of country. I got lonely. I made a mistake, but Maddy was a little premature. Eleven years everything was fine and then boom, out of nowhere he watched something on TV and he tells me her blood type wasn’t right, demanded a test. Personally, I think he was just looking for an excuse to leave us and go fuck some stripper whore. I mean, sure, I made one mistake, but he raised her just like I did. What kind of man holds that against a kid?” She shook her head one more time, and said, “You’re right, this is none of your business, I don’t know why I’m even telling you.” She wiped away her own tear, and said, “It’s been such stress today… I need a drink.” With one deep inhalation, she composed herself and said, “Thank you for trying to comfort her, Mr. Brown.”
“It’s no problem. I, uh, hope things work out for you.”
That was the extent of our conversation that day. Maddy later told me her mother cancelled the grounding and apologized to her and they talked a little. I never mentioned the revelations about her father, because I wasn’t entirely sure if she knew the truth. Her world was precarious as it was, I couldn’t bear to accidentally add one more thing for her to be shattered about.
Those next few days that I saw Maddy, I was very gentle with her. I told her she could keep her clothes on, and we did none of our sexual touching or play… while we did play Daddy and Daughter, it was subdued, like at the start of our relationship, with one added subtext, I’d talk to her about her worries over the divorce a lot more, and sometimes she just needed to cry and be held. The surprising thing was, I didn’t really miss the sexual touching or nudity, the closeness was worth more to me. If she never wanted to do that again, I could enjoy her company just as much.
The first few days, the sadness put a pall over most of our time and the crying was liable to break out at any moment. But gradually, over the course of a week or so, she cried less and smiled more. The divorce and whatever the situation was with her dad, who she’d only heard from once more when he stopped by to pick up the rest of his stuff, still hurt, but it no longer seemed to overwhelm her whole day… it only seemed to bother her when she was reminded of it. I think she was deliberately trying to push it out of her thoughts as much as possible.
When we did return to sexuality, it was because Maddy prompted it, at least mostly. We were watching a movie, and were sitting beside each other, when suddenly she decided to lie down, resting her head in my lap. Well, the sudden, surprising contact awakened my dick and before I could think it back down, I felt her hands working at my zipper. That ended any hope of making my erection fade. “Maddy, you don’t have to…” I said.
“It’s okay, we haven’t done it for a while. I want to.” That was the last thing she said for a couple minutes, because she wrapped her lips around my dick and began sucking. She may have been out of practice, but it hadn’t shown, she was better than ever.
While she went down on me, I found my hands drifting down to her skirt, and decided I might as well give her pleasure too, so I felt underneath to rub her crotch along her panties… back and forth, back and forth. After a minute of that, Maddy herself decided to remove the obstacle. She reached back and pulled her panties down to mid-thigh. I didn’t fully finger her, because Maddy still had a fear of penetration, but I rubbed along the wettening slit while she gave me a blowjob.
“I’m about to cum,” I warned her, but instead of pulling off, she made a sound of acknowledgement, but kept her lips on me. I emptied my balls into her mouth for only the second time, and she swallowed every drop. When she was done, she looked back up at me and smiled. I ran a hand through her hair and said, “I thought you didn’t like the taste.” She’d done it the once, as Supergirl, but after that she still wanted me to pull out.
“I don’t, but if you swallow it as soon as it comes out it you don’t really taste it… and you like it, right?”
“Yeah.” I stopped myself from telling her that I didn’t want her to do it just to please me. After all, if she enjoyed pleasing me, who was I to complain? Instead, I said, “Can I use my tongue on you?”
Her smile turned into a grin. “Oh, yes, Daddy, you certainly can.”
It wasn’t a cure for her sadness, not by any means, but I think it’s natural for people to seek comfort in things that give them pleasure, so I made it my job to give her as much pleasure as possible. Of course, I would have tried regardless, but I tried harder, and that day didn’t stop until I’d given her two orgasms, telling her that I just couldn’t get enough of her, a prospect that amused and seemed to delight her. My tongue was a little sore by the time she left, but it was for a noble cause.
I also had some more opportunities to talk to Maddy’s mother over the next few weeks. Now that we’d said more than a polite hello, the ice was broken to say more. The very next time I saw her I was returning from the convenience store with some milk again, and as I exited the stairwell I saw her carrying a heavy duffle bag and swearing at the elevator. “Something wrong?”
“I think it’s broken again.” It had been doing that at least once a month, maybe more. I usually took the stairs, they were more reliable and good for keeping in shape.
That wouldn’t work for her, at least not easily, and I saw a chance to maybe get a little inside information on how Maddy was doing, since she had a tendency to not tell me when things weren’t all right. “You want a hand with that? I can just throw this in the fridge, then help you carry that downstairs, if you’d like.”
She considered it, but not for long. “If it wouldn’t be much trouble.” Her accent was far milder than it was that first day we talked. Apparently stress brought it out more strongly.
“Nah, I don’t mind, I’m not doing anything.” I popped into my apartment, put away the milk, and returned to heft the bag full of clothes, and the laundry detergent. She carried the fabric softener.
“I really appreciate this, Mr. Brown,” she said as we descended.
“Oh, it’s no problem. I imagine it’s not easy suddenly being a single mother. And you can call me James, if you like.” I braced myself for the joke. I’ve heard them all. I tried switching to Jim when I was a teenager, but it never took.
She didn’t make one. “I’m Natalia… and, well, it’s not like Brian was much help to begin with,” she said. “But at least he brought money in. I had to pick up some extra shifts, so I barely have time to do everything anymore.” What followed was a rant about how busy she was that lasted well past the time it took to get to the laundry room. We continued to talk while she put things into the washing machine. I didn’t mind. I wanted to get to know her a little so it wouldn’t seem out of place when I asked about Maddy. So, I learned that she was from the Ukraine, but moved here when she was thirteen. She met Brian when she was 18 and married far too quickly. According to Natalia, Madeline didn’t know Brian wasn’t her father, but, to my surprise, Brian had found out for sure, with 100% scientific certainty, that he wasn’t Maddy’s father several months ago. Natalia and Brian were struggling to work things out ever since, and getting into frequent fights before things finally fell apart for good.
I came out of that conversation feeling a little more sympathy for her ex. Nothing could forgive how he made Maddy feel, but at least he had tried to stick around and be a father for some time, despite knowing she wasn’t his. Maybe it was just that every time he looked at her, he was reminded about how his wife had betrayed him. I could empathize, after my last girlfriend had cheated on me, I couldn’t hang around many of my friends anymore, because either they still talked to her regularly, or they were involved in introducing us. I never did anything so dramatic as storm out, but I slowly stopped initiating contact with them until they stopped trying with me. But that was friends, not a daughter. I hoped one day soon Brian’d get over it and remember those years of acting like a father and come to miss them.
We parted when it was time to put the clothes in the dryer, but I offered to help her carry the duffle bag up back up the stairs when it was done, and she took me up on that offer, so I made another. “I know it’s hard right now, so just to let you know, if you ever need anything, feel free to knock on my door and ask.”
Natalia gave me that appraising eye for a moment, but then said, “I might take you up on that.” An hour later, she knocked at my door to fetch the clothes, and a little later that afternoon, already had another favor to ask… to haul out some garbage that was too big for the chute and too heavy for her to carry downstairs with the elevator out of service. It was the first she’d asked without me explicitly offering, but wouldn’t be the last.
I didn’t actually see very much of Natalia, since she was working probably more hours than I was, but every couple days I’d hear a knock on my door, or she’d phone from work, and she’d have a request. Sometimes it was to borrow something common, or to change a broken light bulb in the bathroom that she didn’t want to touch (it takes our super days to get to tasks sometimes).
Once it was to ask if I could bring Maddy to meet her at her doctor’s appointment. Natalia had to work an extra hour for someone at work and wouldn’t have time to come home and get Maddy and get to the doctor in time for the appointment. Since I was there, and had a car, she asked if I could pick her up and drive her there.
Some of the other favors might have been a bit inconvenient, but of course I grudgingly, but secretly happily, said yes to that one. It was the first and only time I was able to take little Maddy out into the world without fear.
I took advantage of it and did something else I always wanted to do… I took her to a comic shop. It wasn’t Wednesday, the day comics come out, so the store was pretty empty, but there were a few guys, including one who stared openly, and for a while I started to regret my decision to bring her.
There’s always been a sort of usually unspoken stereotype about comic fans being more likely to be pedophiles, and although I’d deny it if asked, I really think there’s some truth to it. Just from my own observation, in comic circles, particularly online where anonymity is allowed, there seems to be far more people who admit attraction to young girls than other places… and then, of course, there’s a lot of erotic art out there of teen superheroines, even young ones like Kitty Pryde or Jubilee, both of whom started out not much older than Madeline. More recently, at this time, there was Hit-Girl, who had a lot of drawn porn specifically based on the movie version of the character, where she was played by a real little girl. I can’t deny, right before I met Maddy those pictures were some of my more frequent masturbation aids. The movie wasn’t great, but I watched it four times because of her. If we had more time together, I probably would have tried to get Madeline to dress up as her.
I think it’s because of what I said before, that pedophiles just relate to kids, liking what they like, and so naturally become attracted to them. Being a fan of works full of honorable, stalwart heroes, I’m pretty sure most of these are the ones I thought of as the “good” pedophiles, but there’s always a few freaks who relate to the villains, and I didn’t want to risk exposing Maddy to those kind of people.
I tried to guide her away from the potential pervert and took her on a tour of the shelves, picked up a couple trade collections and let Maddy buy something she liked. The guy who stared, whether a good pedophile or a bad, didn’t make a move. Luckily, social phobias are also pretty common in comic fans. Maddy for her part didn’t even notice, she seemed thrilled to be in a store, brought there by her pretend daddy, and get to own some comics of her very own.
The best part was, she didn’t even have to hide the comics from her Mom. I explained that I needed to stop in and pick something up anyway, so I did it on the way, and when Maddy asked for something so she could read while waiting for her appointment, I couldn’t turn her down. There was nothing sinister-sounding about it. It fit into the ‘good guy neighbor’ image I was trying to project for her mother, and Natalia smiled indulgently about the comics and didn’t seem to press the issue.
I just said I was trying to project a “good guy neighbor” image, but it wasn’t really an act… I really thought I was just being considerate, like neighbors should act when they know each other. Sure, I was helping Madeline in a sort of roundabout way by making things easier on her mother, but beyond that, I didn’t have any ulterior motives. So I was surprised when one day Madeline said, in part of a casual conversation, “Oh, yeah, my Mom wants me to invite you over to dinner tonight.”
“What?” I instinctively panicked, mostly because she sent Maddy, which, to my mind suggested she somehow knew Maddy was spending a lot of time with me, and was going to confront me about it. “When?”
“Tonight, I told you.”
“No, when’d she tell you?”
“Oh.” She stopped for a moment, and then said, “Before she went to work, I guess.”
“She doesn’t know you come here, does she?”
“Of course not!” I relaxed, a little.
“So why’d she tell you to invite me?”
She shrugged. “I guess to thank you for helping her out. And we’re having Hamburger Helper, there’s always plenty left over, especially with… just the two of us.”
I meant why she asked Maddy instead of asking me herself, but I let it go. I assumed maybe she wanted to give me enough warning and wasn’t sure if I’d be awake when she left the house, and would be too busy at work to phone.
I didn’t want to go, but I couldn’t think of a way to refuse without being rude. So, nervously, I knocked at her door at a quarter to 7, just as Maddy suggested. I could smell hamburger, so I guess dinner was well underway.
Natalia opened the door. I could see Maddy at the end of the hall. “Oh, hello James.”
“Hi,” I said.
She didn’t make a move to let me in, and we just looked at each other for a few seconds before she said, “I can’t talk long, dinner’s just about ready and Maddy invited a friend over. Did you need something?”
Oh, shit. I tried to think of a way to back out quickly, but Madeline jumped in. “He’s the one I invited,” she said. “I just thought it would be nice to have company, and that we should thank him for helping you so often… and, we have plenty extra.”
“Oh you did. And you didn’t think of running this by me?” Natalia looked first to her daughter, then back to me, but, to my relief, the look she shot me was one of amused tolerance with a hint of conspiracy. Like she was saying, “We both know what’s going on here, right?”
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I thought you were the one who invited me. I can go.” I wanted to go. I was terrified, having no idea what Maddy had in mind, or if she’d mess up and reveal how well we knew each other. As far as Natalia knew, there was just a few brief encounters.
“No, no, you might as well stay, if you were invited. And we will have plenty.”
I entered and while waiting for dinner, tried to look at or talk to Maddy as little as possible, to reinforce the suggestion that she was just a kid to me, one I barely knew, but luckily she didn’t seem to try to force the issue. She was pretty quiet while we sat near each other. I think she realized she’d crossed a line that shouldn’t have been crossed, and even felt guilty. Instead, I talked to Natalia, asking about how her day went, and giving her a chance to vent about stupid customers or co-workers which filled the time nicely, even if it was a bit of a chore to listen to.
After putting the plates on the table, Natalia opened up a bottle of red wine and poured a liberal amount into a glass. “Would you like some wine?”
“No thanks,” I said.
“It’s not as though you have to drive home, you know,” she joked.
Mostly I wanted to be completely clear-headed to navigate the minefield, but for politeness’ sake, I smiled and said, “Maybe just a little bit, I don’t drink much.”
She poured me about half the amount in her own glass, slid it over, and then gave Madeline a choice between apple or orange juice. She chose apple.
We ate the cheesy beefy macaroni in relative silence for a minute or two, before Maddy broke it. “So, Mr. Brown, what do you do? For, like, a job?”
“I’m a database administrator. Computer stuff, not very interesting.”
“Oh. We don’t even have a computer anymore.”
My eyes widened in surprise. That just seemed impossible, but then Natalia explained, “Brian took it.”
I turned to Maddy. “Sorry, I guess that must be hard, not being able to get on the Internet.”
“Maddy’s not allowed on the Internet anyway, not without me there. Too many bad people. We had a problem with cyberbullying last year.”
“So this database minister,” Maddy said. “It must pay a lot, right? I hear computer jobs pay a lot.”
“Madeline,” her mother scolded. “That’s not polite.” Though I noticed her eyes lifted towards me as though wondering about the answer herself.
“I do all right,” I said.
Maddy continued to prompt me. “I bet you had to go to college for that, right?”
“Yeah. It’s not easy, but it pays off in the end. Do you do well in school?”
“Madeline gets very good marks,” her mother said, clearly proud, as she refilled her wine glass. “She’s a… what do you call it, bookworm.”
“That’s good, you should keep it up. School’s important.” Realizing I was breaking my own rule about talking too much to Maddy, I looked back at her mother.
Madeline suddenly had another question. “So I know you’re not married, but do you have a girlfriend or something?”
“Madeline,” Natalia said with a warning tone that was probably more about her lack of subtlety than anything else. I had to agree on that point. It was like she was trying to shove me in front of her mother and say, “Look, he’s single, smart, and financially secure! Date him!”
The problem was, I didn’t especially want to date Natalia. Oh, she looked good enough, and if we met under different circumstances, maybe I’d consider it, but it was wrong to do it when the primary thing I was interested in was her daughter, and, to be honest, she was a little annoying. A lot of the times when she complained about someone at work, it was for innocent mistakes, and sometime it sounded like she took a kind of cruel delight when they failed. She struck me as the type who found fault with everybody else but downplayed their own errors or blamed others. The kind of person who would bitch at somebody for not helping them in a tight spot, and yet also bitch if forced to delay her own break to give them a hand. Maybe I was being unkind… after all, she was just venting after a long day, but still, she seemed nothing like the kind, forgiving, open person her daughter seemed to be, and not really the kind of person I wanted to date.
I thought about lying to put Maddy off that path, but that plan could backfire. If I said I had a girlfriend and Maddy thought I was telling the truth, or that I meant her, who knew how she might react? So I just said, “No, not right now.”
I asked Natalia more about her life, what it was like growing up in the Ukraine, despite not really being interested, mostly to divert Maddy from asking more questions about me. She did point out that I seemed fit and asked if I worked out, but that was probably the most blatant of her attempts to sell me to her mother.
Maddy also invited me to watch a movie with them afterwards, which got another glare from her mother, and I decided that was as good an excuse as any to make my exit. “No, actually, I do have a bit of work I need to catch up on before tomorrow, but thank you, dinner was lovely.”
Natalia sent Madeline to her room, and walked me out, then followed me to the hallway. “I’m sorry about my daughter,” she said.
“Oh, no, it’s okay, she seems like a nice kid.”
“I don’t know where she got the idea that she should try to set us up.” She paused, and then looked at me sidelong. “Unless… you didn’t put her up to it, did you?”
“No,” I said quickly. “Why would I do that?”
“You think I haven’t noticed? How since my husband left you’ve tried to be so nice, listening to my problems, offering to do me favors. Men don’t act like that for nothing…”
“Oh, no,” I said. “It’s nothing like that. Really. I just thought you might need help. Just being neighborly. That’s all, I swear.”
“Neighborly.” Her lips tightened into a line.
“That’s it,” I said. “I feel bad for you, and I wanted to help out where I can.”
“Good,” she said suddenly, turning away a little too quickly. “Because it’s too soon for me to get involved with somebody. The divorce isn’t even final yet.”
Did I offend her? I hadn’t meant to, although if I knocked out hope out of a relationship, it was hard to consider that a bad thing. “I don’t mean that you’re not beautiful or anything, I’m just saying I wasn’t thinking like that. I figured it was too soon for you anyway.”
“Good, then we’re on the same page. And to be honest, you’re not exactly my type.”
That was blunt. I guess I had offended her. “Okay. Well, thank you for dinner.”
“Good night,” she said and returned to her apartment.
The next time I saw Maddy, I confronted her on the obvious attempt to set us up. She teared up a little. “I know, it was a dumb idea, okay? I just thought… if you and Mom got together, we wouldn’t have to move, and you could really be my daddy, and you’d want that.”
“I would want that,” I told her. “If it were possible. But you can’t just force people together. Your mother’s nice, but I just don’t feel that way about her, and nothing’s worse than people being together who don’t want to be.” I knelt down and said, “It doesn’t affect how I feel about you, though, that will never change.” I hugged her, and she hugged back tightly.
“Mom keeps talking about how we’re going to have to move soon,” she said.
“I know. I’m going to miss you so much.”
“But we can enjoy our time together, until then, right?” she nodded and sniffled, but composed herself, and we had another summer day of talking, father-daughter fun, and partial nudity. We didn’t do anything sexual, though, that day, aside from light, casual touching while we were playing a game, but not to arousal.
Only weeks ago, I would have worried that, with the specter of Maddy’s departure looming, that I’d have wanted to push the envelope, get as much sexual enjoyment out of her at I could before she was gone, maybe even push her into having sex, but I guess I should have had a little more faith in myself, because I actually held back even more. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew I wanted Maddy to remember the fun of having a father-figure who would give her his attention, rather than one who just wanted sex in those last days. And I think I decided that I really would miss the closeness more… after all, although sex with a girl Maddy’s age might be a rare experience, the ultimate fantasy for a pedophile, but mechanically, it’s just sex. If I put out the effort, I could probably get sex from somewhere else, and it would probably be better for Maddy if I held off and didn’t try to take her virginity… but it wouldn’t be as easy to have someone who I could treat like a daughter.
That’s not to say we didn’t do anything over the next few days, I’m no saint, and I made her cum quite a few times and she returned the favor with her hand or mouth, sometimes swallowing, sometimes not, but I tried not to make it the focus of our time, even while we both knew that time was running out.
Sometimes, in my weaker moments, I considered actually doing what Maddy had wanted, putting myself out there and trying to go after her mother, romantically, just so I could keep Madeline in my life. How bad could it be, I told myself. Maybe I could get to really like Natalia. These moments never lasted long before I decided it could never work, and it only took seeing Natalia one more time before those thoughts were banished forever.
It was a few days after that awkward, unexpected dinner date that she came knocking on my door again after work, for the first time since I’d, presumably, offended her. “Can I come in?” she asked, which was a bit unusual. She’d actually never been in my apartment, whenever she had a favor she asked me at my door and never came inside. But this time she did, and seemed nervous. “I don’t know exactly how to say this…” she began, once inside.
I shrugged, a little wary just on general principle, but she didn’t seem to be upset at me, so she probably hadn’t figured out anything was up with me and Maddy. “Simple is probably best.”
“You know it’s been hard, since Brian left.” I nodded, relaxing. It was just another favor. “Especially with money. It’s not cheap taking care of a daughter. I picked up extra shifts, and my rainy day fund lasted a lot longer than I thought it would, but… it’s still not enough. Rent’s coming due in a few days, and… I’m going to be a little short.”
“How much do you need?” I asked.
“Three hundred. Four if you can manage it.” I frowned instantly, and she saw it. “I know, it’s a lot to ask, but I’m desperate here… please. I promise you, James, I will think of a way to make it up to you.” She took a step forward, and all of a sudden, her hand was on my crotch, rubbing it into stiffness.
“Uhm, I don’t think…” I was going to say that it wasn’t necessary, that it wasn’t a good idea, but she must have thought I meant that I wouldn’t give her the money, because she dropped suddenly to the ground.
“Please, can’t you see, I’m on my knees here?” She was, and working my zipper.
I let her, and let her take my cock out. She did it like someone who’d had a lot of practice at doing that quickly and efficiently, but then, I didn’t do anything to stop her. I think there’s an instinct that when a woman is coming on to you, doing something sexual, and it’s a complete surprise to you, to just let it happen, even if you have loads of rational reasons why it wouldn’t be a good idea, even if you don’t really want it.
She stroked up and down the shaft a little, keeping me pumped and erect, and then opened her mouth, extended her tongue, and licked the underside of my dick as the top of her mouth closed over it. Natalia went down on me four or five times before she pulled back and looked up at me. “So what do you think, will you help me out? I will be very appreciative. I might thank you every time I see you.”
She sucked on me again, and I had this vision, of Natalia coming to suck my dick every day shortly after her daughter Maddy had just done the same thing. It was a powerful image, and my cock pulsed and jerked at it, but I also felt incredibly guilt, and this time the guilt was more powerful than the arousal. More than the guilt, I felt so bad for Madeline, a deadbeat dad and a mother who was now, literally, a bit of a whore.
I pulled away the next time she came up for air, and started to turn so I could zip myself up. “Look, don’t do this,” I said.
“What’s the problem?” she asked with a frown. “You’re not a homosexual, are you?”
“No,” I said. “It’s just, this isn’t right. You shouldn’t do… that, to ask for money.”
“Don’t be so naïve,” she said. “You give me something, I give you something, that’s all it is. What’s the harm?”
Technically I might have agreed with her. I had no moral problem with prostitution, and in some ways I felt it was refreshingly honest… it just felt so wrong in this case, particularly because I was thinking about Maddy. I guess I’m one of those stereotypical liberals who has no theoretical problem with prostitution, but wouldn’t want my daughter to do it… or my daughter’s mother. “Look, if you need the money that badly, I can help you out, but… no favors.”
She stood up, rolling her eyes a little as though I was the crazy one. “Good then.”
I told her I’d be right back, and went for my office and got some money out of my wallet. I like to keep a lot of cash on hand, because I’m cheap enough to hate paying ATM fees, but what she wanted pretty much cleaned me out. I gave her about three hundred sixty, in all, which she took with a grudging thank you. You’d think she’d have been more grateful, getting the money she wanted without having to promise regular blowjobs to do it, but maybe she resented me looking down on her.
I guess that must have been the case because, aside from brief encounters in the hallway, I never saw Natalia again and though I could sense my time with Maddy was coming to an end, I had no idea how quickly and abrupt it would be.
We still spent days together, during the summer, and by her own choice she started spending more time naked, or nearly so, again, saying she was hot, even with my air conditioner running, and why wear clothes if she didn’t have to? I certainly had to agree, she was hot. When she was mostly clothed, even topless, I found it easy not to make a move unless she practically asked me, but when she was almost completely naked the whole day, I usually couldn’t resist, at some point, rubbing her pussy, which usually would lead to more. But though we performed oral sex on each other regularly, I still never pushed beyond it for anything we hadn’t yet done. Maddy kept bringing up how she was going to be moving, and I knew it was on her mind, but considering I’d just helped her mother pay her rent, I didn’t think it was serious until one day she said, “Mom wants to be moved in before school starts.”
That was only a few weeks away, depending on the board. Some started earlier, some started later. “Oh. I thought you’d be here longer.” If Natalia’d paid her rent with the money I gave her, then she still should have an extra month from the money she paid when she first moved in. Now I wondered if she’d used the money for something else.
“Yeah. It sucks so much. I’m going to miss coming here.”
“I’ll miss you too. But you can still visit. And, hey, a new school, that’s something to get excited about.”
She shrugged. “I guess.”
“Fresh start, new friends,” I reminded her.
“Big deal,” she said with a pout. “I’ll still be the same geeky girl nobody liked here.”
“That’s not true, not everyone can be as stupid as the kids in your school. But anyway, that’s the thing about a fresh start, you get the chance to reinvent yourself.”
She thought about that for a minute. “You mean like try to go scene or something?”
I didn’t even know what scene was, not exactly, just that it was a style. “If you want.”
“You know what I should do,” she said. “Stop coming off like such a geek. Just be one of those girls that sleeps through class. Get rid of all my books.”
“Don’t be silly,” I said. “How are you going to be an archaeologist without good grades?”
“So what? Everyone thinks it’s weird to want to be one.”
“But you love it, don’t you?”
“Yeah, but whenever I try to talk about it people just roll their eyes and start talking about something else. I’d have more friends if I just stopped caring about it.”
“You’ll have friends regardless.” She made a dismissive noise. “It’s true. The girl I’ve come to know over the past few months is charming and sweet and funny and brave. Anyone who doesn’t see that and want to be near you has their head up their ass, and doesn’t deserve to have someone like you around. You know the most important thing I’d tell my daughter?” She looked up at me, waiting. “Life’s unfair, and sometimes you just can’t hold on to what you love… but you never, ever, abandon what you love. Not for something as fleeting as popularity. Those people aren’t going to be with you forever. Please, Maddy. I love who you are… don’t change for other people. I mean, if you think you need to, you can build a new image for yourself, but don’t lose track of who you are underneath.”
“I guess I could just pretend to be dumb, but still study hard at home.” She smiled a little. “Like a secret identity.”
I smiled back. “Yeah, you could do that. Personally, I don’t think you’ll need one. You just need to be confident in who you are.”
That ended that conversation, but the next day, she brought it up again. “I was thinking,” she started. “About my new image.”
“You said I needed to be more confident.”
“Uh-huh… well, that would certainly help. Confidence helps with so much in life.” I felt like a hypocrite, because I certainly wasn’t confident.
“Well… there’s one thing that could make me more confident.”
“If we had sex.”
What a bombshell. “What?”
“Then I wouldn’t be a virgin anymore. I wouldn’t have to wonder or be scared. I’ll have something over all the other girls who’ve never done it yet. The girls at my last school always said I acted too immature, and what’s more mature than having had sex?”
“Maddy… you really should give your virginity to someone you love.”
“I love you, Daddy.”
Those first three words were powerful, words I hadn’t heard from anybody in far too long. Even if it was just as a surrogate father figure, as I thought she must have meant. “That’s not what I mean…”
“Do you love me?”
I paused, then answered honestly. “Yeah. I love you.” It wasn’t quite romantic love, perhaps, although it could have grown into it, but it was still love.
“So let’s do it. Before it’s too late.”
“Are you sure?” I asked. I wanted it, and was practically shaking with excitement, but I didn’t want to push.
“Yes. Come on.” She led me into my own bedroom. At the time, it being a bit of a cooler day, we were both dressed. She wore a pair of shorts and a light shirt with spaghetti straps. I was wearing a t-shirt and jeans, my usual outfit when we weren’t hanging around naked. “Just tell me what to do,” she said as she took off her shirt. By now, she had no shame around me, walking around with her nipples showing, but it still astounded me for the first few seconds every time I saw it. “I mean, I know how it works, I think, but I don’t know what you like best.”
I undressed too, as she sat on the bed and drew her bent legs up, looking unsure what to do. “You know it might hurt the first time, right?” I warned her. “We don’t have to do this.”
“I told you, I want to. Just… be gentle.”
“Okay. Then I should probably lick you first. It’ll make it easier to go in.”
She nodded and spread her legs widely, and I crouched by the side of the bed and began planting soft kisses up and down her thighs, closing on her mound. Soon, I turned kissing into licking, and spent almost half an hour down there, my tongue in her slit and playing around her clit. My intention wasn’t just to lube her up, although it seemed to be doing that well, but also to get her as close to orgasm as possible. If this was going to be her first time, I wanted her to cum before I did. Ideally, I’d have liked to cum at the same time, but I’d settle for knowing she reached a climax with my hard cock inside her.
With that image making my cock swell once again, I remembered her previous hesitancy towards penetration of any kind, except for a tongue. If we were going to have sex, she would have to get over it. “I’m going to put my finger in if that’s okay,” I said.
She was already breathing heavily, but it sounded like she took an extra long breath. “Okay. Just, slowly.”
My finger approached her slit, made contact and slid down to the hole, and then inside. To cover any discomfort, I put my tongue back into action. She tensed a little, but there was no resistance and a lot of slickness, and my finger started to slide in easily. I sawed it in and out, right to the knuckle. “Is that okay?”
“Yeah,” she said, sounding surprised. “It didn’t hurt this time.”
“Umm, I tried before once to stick something inside. It hurt.”
“Oh,” I said, realizing she must have already busted her hymen. All that worry she had for nothing. “You remember how I said it hurts the first time?”
“Uh huh…” She sounded just a little scared.
“Well, I think you already got the hurt out of the way. I don’t think it’s going to be a problem.”
She smiled, beautifully, showing the little gap in her teeth. “Really?”
“Then are we going to do it?”
“Let’s just make sure.” I inserted another finger, and she took that easily, and I practically slobbered my tongue over her slit while pushing in and out of her hole. She was ready… or maybe I was. I pulled out and stood up. “Okay,” I said.
As if I wasn’t a bad Daddy already for what I was doing, I didn’t even really consider a condom. It briefly passed through my mind, but I think I realized that this might be my only chance to have sex with a girl like Maddy, and I wanted to do it without a barrier in between us. I knew I was safe from diseases and somehow didn’t think Maddy was old enough to get pregnant yet, but I still should have put one on, and I didn’t. Yet another failing.
I lay on the bed beside her. “Come over here. We’ll do it with you on top.”
“Yeah. That way if it ever does start to hurt, you can stop any time. It’s also my favorite way to do it.”
“Okay… show me how.”
She crawled on top of me, and I guided her until her pussy was right above my dick. I held it up straight. “Lower yourself, slowly.”
The wet lips parted smoothly as she slid onto my cock. She took it slowly, with a little bit of grunting, but no obvious pain, and soon she was down all the way, her ass on my balls. “We’re doing it,” she said, as though scarcely able to believe it. “It feels good.”
I could hardly believe it either, it was so tight it was hard to believe it all fit. “Yeah. Now, just slide up and down, at whatever pace you’re comfortable with.”
I let her take it slowly at first, but as she began building up speed, my own hands guided her, and I became more active, pushing up into her as she pushed down. “You like that?” I asked.
“Yes Daddy,” she said. “I love it.”
After a few minutes of her riding me up and down, she started a low, undulating moan, and her body, her pussy especially, started tensing and relaxing, going into contractions. The moan turned into the words, “Oh, Daddy, oh Daddy, oh Daddeeeeeeeeeee…” and I almost blew my load right then, but I rode out her climax, and then, shortly afterwards, had my own, exploding inside of her.
After we were done, she fell on my chest and we lay together in one sweaty mass. “That was…”
She lifted her head. “You liked it?”
I nodded. “Yeah. It was incredible.”
“I’m glad. I did too. I’m happy we did it.” She put her ear to my chest, like she was listening to my heart. “We’re moving tomorrow.”